Friday, June 17. 2005
Zen and the Art of Overnight Call
Just coming off the last overnight call of my third year! Here are some rules to survive the thirty-hour shift:
1. Never state the fact that you have not been paged. If you do, your residents will label you a “black cloud” when the team is paged to the ER at 2 AM for 3 admissions.
2. Always maintain a state of cat-like readiness while sprawled out, asleep, on the physicians lounge sofa. Place an open book on your lap. When someone walks by, open your eyes and pretend to study. People will think you’re smart.
3. Pack a clean pair of socks. Don’t ask why. When it happens you’ll thank me.
4. On call you have two pagers, your own and the rotating “code pager” which belatedly sounds about ten minutes after a code blue is called over hospital intercom. 90% of people who are subjected to a code blue don’t make it, so you’re unlikely to make things much worse by trying to do something. One of the most sickening feelings in medicine is being the first person to start chest compressions when an elderly patient loses their pulse. Their bones are so osteoporotic that your first thrust breaks nearly all of their ribs in staccato succession.
5. Final thing to remember, DON’T PANIC… it gets much worse.
“The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease.” (Voltaire)